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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24665830">Subtly Gets You No Where</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneLetteredWonder/pseuds/OneLetteredWonder'>OneLetteredWonder</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Sanders One Shots [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Compliant, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Pining</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 05:09:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,849</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24665830</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneLetteredWonder/pseuds/OneLetteredWonder</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Relationships are bullshit alright? Love is ridiculous,” Virgil shakes his head.</p>
<p>“Plus! Either way it’s going to end. You’ll either get broken up with or someone is going to die and leave you alone, and both of those options suck.” He finishes. Logan rubs at his chin thoughtfully.</p>
<p>“You don’t think there’s good in having that time together?” His voice is softer as he asks. Virgil scrunches up his face like someone asked him to eat garbage.</p>
<p>“Not really,” There’s something burning in the pit of his stomach at the flash of dejection that passes through Logan’s eyes. It sets him panicking. He pushes off the floor.</p>
<p>“I’m going to go take a nap,” He rushes out the words. Logan tilts his head.</p>
<p>“You just woke up an hour ago.”</p>
<p>“Time isn’t real,” Virgil lets himself out and shuts the door behind him quietly.</p>
<p>“Shit."</p>
<p>--</p>
<p>Subtly and care get you no where when the person you’re trying to subtly and carefully woo thinks too negatively and won’t pick up your clues and it’s subtly driving you insane.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Sanders One Shots [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1768828</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>120</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Subtly Gets You No Where</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It seemed to start sometime after their first debate. Virgil would just be sitting around in his room or even venturing out to the commons in the odd moments he felt courageous enough to curl up on his extra cushioned rocking chair when he would be sought out. That itself annoyed him but he wouldn’t complain. It felt nice to be wanted.</p>
<p>He’s on his bed with his phone open to some simple word search app to keep his mind occupied. The voices in his head are quiet for once so he enjoys the silence without music while he can. His eyes scan the screen for the proper order of letters when there’s a knock on his door. He jerks at the sound but calms seeing who it is.</p>
<p>“Good afternoon Anxiety,” Logan greets him with whatever time of day it is, his hands clasped gently in front of him. Virgil wonders if it really is a ‘good’ afternoon. Then wonders what time it is because he’s sure he hasn’t been in bed all day. The clock on his wall that spins out of control is no help and his phone glitches over the time, so he believes Logan’s statement.</p>
<p>“Hey,” He greets simply not exactly sure why Logan is at his door. Logan clears his throat softly.</p>
<p>“I was wondering if you would be able to assist me for a moment,” He says. Like the times before, the conversation follows the same pattern. Virgil is sure the rest of the day will follow suit but he won’t hold his breath for it. He shrugs and manages to flop out of bed and follow the logical trait down to their room. They hold it open for him and he takes a spot he’s grown comfortable with on Logan’s floor.</p>
<p>“I wanted to know your opinion on something,” Logan tells him and Virgil snorts. It takes another question or two of prodding for him to open up, going off on worries and concerns and possible outcomes to the situation Logan has brought up. He has a notebook at the ready, taking notes or writing down things he notices Virgil isn’t sure. Somehow Logan always has something smart to shoot back at him.</p>
<p>This isn’t the first time. It scared him half to death the first time he had been searched for. Had he done something wrong? Is Logan mad? What is going on? The question turned his mind to mush until Logan had admitted to wanting to know what he thought. That brought down a whole new avalanche of questions that Virgil ignored in turn for getting the interaction over with as soon as possible.</p>
<p>It’s gotten better. Maybe. He doesn’t stutter and start his sentences over as much, and he can start talking sooner than the million specific questions Logan could ask to get the answers he wants. Virgil knows how to tangent and with the lack of judgement that Logan gives, it’s easy to just talk. It’s not bad when Logan tells him something new, when they talk over each other trying to get their own point across. Logan always seems satisfied with the end result.</p>
<p>It always surprises him when Logan knocks on his door or bothers him in the commons. He always suspects the last time will actually be the <em>last</em> time. He doesn’t expect Logan to show up. It’s nice he does though. It’s one of the few things he has that’s nice in the mind palace.</p>
<p>With the few and far between silence he receives in his own room and the once in a blue moon smile from Patton, there’s not much for him in the mind palace. There’s anger and fear and snide comments paired with snide looks. While his room doesn’t provide those things exactly, the barbed wire words don’t hold much more for him. A double edged sword and he’s getting cut either way.</p>
<p>“Thank you Anxiety for spending this time with me, it was very informative,” Logan stands from his desk and offers him a hand up. Virgil doesn’t take it, helping himself off the floor with a huff.</p>
<p>“You’re welcome I guess,” He says and sees himself out. He flops down to his bed face first. He talked a lot and the energy needed for such a thing is drained from entirely. Finding his headphones he plays something soft and low. It’s enough to keep voices from telling him he should have just stayed in his room.</p>
<hr/>
<p>“I have a more.. personal topic if you don’t mind for today,” Logan says, almost apprehensively. Virgil just blinks at him from his spot on the floor. He has claimed the spot for himself whenever Logan indulges in listening to him ramble. It’s less awkward than the bed and more comfortable than the other chair closer to the other that Logan offers every time. He can sprawl out and not feel cramped either.</p>
<p>Logan’s room is crisp and clean, everything in it’s spot and nothing out of place. Well, except for Virgil that is. His dark clothing doesn’t necessarily contradict the blues and whites but it sure doesn’t blend well enough. He pulls his legs to his chest.</p>
<p>Maybe this is bonding? Logan doesn’t talk to the others as much, tending to stick to himself or a book. Sure he and Patton need to talk out lifestyle stuff for Thomas sometimes, and the whole internal conflict of if he needs to grow up more put them on a bit of a schedule but that’s scheduled talks they have. This is Logan searching him out of his own volition. </p>
<p>“I mean, I guess that’s okay.” He shrugs. He’s not sure what would happen if he said no. Logan would probably accept the response and move on to something else, but insidious thoughts have him thinking down a different path.</p>
<p>“Though not the main proponent to Thomas’s feelings, I wanted to know your opinion on love and-” Virgil snorts, lifting a hand to cover his mouth to hid the beginnings of a smile. That smile falls immediately seeing the perplexed look on the logical trait’s face.</p>
<p>“Is this topic not to your liking?” Logan asks plainly. Virgil rolls his eyes.</p>
<p>“Pleeeassee,” He levels Logan with a sneer that’s not as mean as it could be. Logan sits a little straighter in his desk chair.</p>
<p>“Relationships and romantic feelings, no matter how much I don’t understand, have been proven needed for a fulfilling lifestyle,” He says. Virgil snorts again.</p>
<p>“Relationships are bullshit alright? Love is ridiculous,” He shakes his head as the ideas flow into his mind.</p>
<p>“It makes you act stupid, you’re constantly worried about what you’re saying and doing,” He holds out his fingers as he brings up point after point. Logan is glancing at him then back to his notebook rapidly as he scrawls down what he deems important.</p>
<p>“Plus! Either way it’s going to end. You’ll either get broken up with or someone is going to die and leave you alone, and both of those options suck.” He finishes. Logan rubs at his chin thoughtfully.</p>
<p>“You don’t think there’s good in having that time together?” His voice is softer as he asks. Virgil scrunches up his face like someone asked him to eat garbage.</p>
<p>“Not really,” There’s something burning in the pit of his stomach at the flash of dejection that passes through Logan’s eyes. It sets him panicking. He pushes off the floor.</p>
<p>“I’m going to go take a nap,” He rushes out the words. Logan tilts his head.</p>
<p>“You just woke up an hour ago.”</p>
<p>“Time isn’t real,” Virgil lets himself out and shuts the door behind him quietly. He can hear Patton and Roman in the commons. He slinks past and into his room as quietly as he can, the only noise being the light <em>click</em> of the door when it shuts him in his darkened room.</p>
<p>He doesn’t fall onto his bed at first. He sits just at the base of it on the floor, curling up and replaying his words in his head. This has happened before but this time, it’s worse. He left really early, their somewhat conversation and debate barely even getting started when he felt the need to get out. Now that he’s out, he’s not sure it had been a good idea.</p>
<p>“Shit,” He mumbles and manages to curl up even more in himself. Why didn’t he just shut his big mouth and let Logan be right? Why didn’t he stay to hear what Logan would say? Why did he join him in the first place? Should have stayed in his room, should have never left, should have never, never, never.</p>
<p>He grits his teeth hard. Every time. Every time he thinks he’s doing okay, he ruins it. Him and Roman had the smallest of understandings after their Disney debacle, but none of it mattered the next time, they talked like it never happened. Patton didn’t take his side at all after Virgil tried to get them both to a happier place. Logan came to talk to him after their debates sure, when Virgil participated, but this? He’s sure it will never happen again. It’s all his fault.</p>
<hr/>
<p>Logan looks… desperate. He’s mouth is running a mile a minute about some curve thing that Virgil isn’t sure he’s actually helpful towards but Logan has a way of making him believe whatever he’s saying with his reasoning. His face scrunches up in disbelief anyway.</p>
<p>He just wanted to go away. To leave. To make everything easier on himself and Thomas and the others but it couldn’t be that could it. They had to come searching for him, to come barreling into the center of his room and demand to speak with him. Why couldn’t they just let him go?</p>
<p>“Anxiety please,” Thomas is begging him and it hurts. He did this, he hurt Thomas. He shakes his head and once more Logan is talking.</p>
<p>“You’re important, you help Thomas more than you realize,” He says hurriedly. He’s trying so hard and Virgil can tell. After he walked out Logan didn’t stop asking him to debates, but Virgil stopped really participating, which is almost worst than not going at all. Logan didn’t deserve his half assed replies, deserved better.</p>
<p>“You’re that feeling of tinglyness!” Patton throws out louder than he means too. Virgil jumps at the outburst then jumps at Logan screaming after. He puts a hand to his head, sick of it all. It’s not like they were the last straw to try and leave. He couldn’t blame them, they tried at least.</p>
<p>Roman just had to speak up though. Apologizing in his own special way. Maybe that’s what Virgil had been after. Some kind of acknowledgement from the one that had been ragging on him from the beginning. It fills that little bit of nagging in the back of his mind. Any sense of fulfillment is quickly ripped away by the panic in Logan’s voice, circling his graph with fever.</p>
<p>“Breathe, that’s good,” He coaches Thomas safely out of his room’s center and back to safety. There’s a calm settled over them. A calm he can actually relax in. Be comfortable in.</p>
<p>“It’s the vigilant people who work the hardest,” Logan points out. There’s a smile on his face that’s rare on it’s own, one that Virgil finds himself returning, even if only to his feet. He does take a quick glance up to Logan though who looks relaxed now that they’re back where they should be.</p>
<p>“No pressure,” Logan reassures him, soothing and calm. Virgil takes a deep breath.</p>
<p>“My name is Virgil,” He ends up shouting louder than he means too.</p>
<hr/>
<p>It’s awkward. Just a little. Ever since he told them his name, the others treat him differently. More kindly and with more involvement. It’s not something he’s used to, yet finds himself enjoying. He can talk movies with Roman, and bake with Patton, and have weird eye contact with Logan as he enters a room then decides the awkward isn’t worth his mental health and leaves.</p>
<p>It sends a pit of something awful spiraling into his stomach. Logan doesn’t say anything to him. Did he do something wrong? They haven’t had a debate in so long. Yes he stopped really participating, but Logan also stopped asking. He blames himself for that.</p>
<p>He’s sitting in his chair in the commons, playing on his phone when Logan enters. He jerks having not spotted him before and immediately begins to shift out of his spot as the logical trait settles into his easy chair. Virgil almost trips over himself in his effort to leave.</p>
<p>“You can stay if you like.” The voice calls to him. Logan’s voice sounds weird. Virgil shrinks in on himself as he turns to look at the other. Their awkward staring contest doesn’t last long. Logan pauses, giving him a skeptical look, when he shakes his head. Virgil gestures vaguely to his chair opposite Logan’s.</p>
<p>“You don’t mind?” He says it with more disbelief than he means. The surprised look Logan gives him after messes with that pit of awful in his stomach, but then Logan sighs and smiles to him, not taking Virgil’s doubt harshly.</p>
<p>“Not in the slightest. You’re one of the only people I can have a comfortable silence with,” Logan tells him honestly, head angling down to be lost in the pages of his book. Virgil stares in a stunned shock. He didn’t think after all this time they would be able to handle silence. A smile twitches onto his face as he takes back his chair, going back to his phone, and ignoring the pleased smile Logan has for himself. He chalks it up to something interesting in the story he’s reading.</p>
<p>He hides the smile that just won’t leave in his hand. He’s missed his moments with Logan. The silence is far more comfortable than he could ever imagine.</p>
<hr/>
<p>There’s a knock on his door, it jerks him upright, fumbling with his phone and accidentally throwing it half way across the room. He blinks at Logan dumbly from where they stand in the doorway. It takes at least two deep breathes for him to be able to talk.</p>
<p>“Hey?” He asks. Logan shifts from foot to foot, not saying anything. It does very little for Virgil’s own nerves.</p>
<p>“Can I help you?” He doesn’t hide the annoyance in his voice but part of him knows Logan won’t mind. Finally the logical trait snaps into action, clasping his hands and clearing his throat softly.</p>
<p>“May I speak to you for a moment?” He asks. Virgil shrugs and goes to get out of bed to follow Logan to his room as he’s used to but Logan steps inside and shuts the door.</p>
<p>“Uhh,” Virgil’s eyes go wide as Logan comes closer. He takes a seat on the edge of Virgil’s bed and rests his elbows on his knees in a contemplation pose. Virgil continues to stare at him because he’s not sure what to do.</p>
<p>“Virgil,” Logan says first. Reflexively Virgil’s face twists up, still very unused to hearing it said aloud. The twist sticks around as Logan doesn’t say anything after that. It does nothing for the anxiety that bubbles up inside him.</p>
<p>“Do you remember our small debate about relationships?” Is what he says and Virgil groans in annoyance. He detangles himself from his covers to sit criss-cross next to Logan.</p>
<p>“Wouldn’t call it much of a debate seeing I left ten minutes into it.”</p>
<p>“So you do, wonderful,” Logan ignores what he says and Virgil rolls his eyes. There’s a stiff awkwardness in Logan’s posture that has him on edge though. Part of him thinks it’s his room, but they aren’t in the center of it so it wouldn’t be that.</p>
<p>“It has come to my attention that-” Logan cuts himself off, but at least his words have stopped Virgil’s downward spiral of thoughts. He waits as patiently as possible but even as they discussed before, he’s not very patient.</p>
<p>“I would very much.. appreciate,” Logan stops again, grimacing to himself and trying to find the right words. Virgil raises his eyebrows in shock of Logan being lost for words. It makes him more nervous.</p>
<p>“The opportunity, to be.. Involved.. In a romantic relationship. With you. Specifically.” He finally finishes his thought only to look over at Virgil who couldn’t snap his fallen jaw shut if he tried. His entire body is dropped in confusion and staring at Logan if he has two heads. Maybe three.</p>
<p>“What.” Is all he manages to say. Logan clears his throat.</p>
<p>“I understand if you do not, of course,” Though he says so, there’s a small something sad in his eyes. Virgil’s fidgeting begins slowly but soon his whole body is rocking back and forth.</p>
<p>“I don’t know how to deal with that,” His voice is a little strained but he can’t care about that right now. Logan nods in understanding, like he always has.</p>
<p>“Like, are you serious? I’m a fucking mess, I don’t know how you expect to deal with me,” Virgil goes on and Logan snaps his head to look at him deadly serious.</p>
<p>“I do not <em>deal</em> with you,” He puts air quotes up at the word.</p>
<p>“I enjoy your company and find myself wanting to do more romantically inclined activities with you.” Logan’s confidence is back and has taken a turn towards the tone he uses when they debate. Slightly condescending but wanting to prove the point. That Virgil can handle.</p>
<p>“Romantically inclined. You want to go on dates and have dinner and hold hands?” Virgil snarks. Logan scoffs.</p>
<p>“If that is what you want in a relationship then I will happily provide. I understand the properties that go into a romantic partner and can see no other I would want to be with.” He says, turning to face Virgil more so. He’s moving his hands the way he does when he’s trying to convey his meaning exactly.</p>
<p>“Is this a game or something? Some puzzle or experiment?” Is maybe one of Virgil’s last ditch arguments but he’s seen Logan do dumb things just to see the outcome so it’s not outlandish. Logan either way leans back offended as ever.</p>
<p>“I would never toy with feelings in such a trivial manner. Surely you must know that.” Logan directs at him, the makings of a smirk on his face. Virgil rolls his eyes.</p>
<p>“And how do you know this is true feelings or some made up malarkey that you just-”</p>
<p>“I would have never come to say what I did if I had not been sure. I went to an expert before hand to make sure what I feel is real and when given a complete rundown and this conclusion, decided to do something about it,” Logan tells him succinctly. Virgil narrows his eyes.</p>
<p>“Is Patton the expert?”</p>
<p>“Patton is the expert yes.” Virgil snorts and lifts a hand to cover his face. Of course. Of course Logan would go to Patton, the all knowing feeling master, to figure out what is going on with him. When he finally looks up there’s a slight smile on Logan’s face. He returns it a little and shrugs.</p>
<p>“Like I said I understand if you do not feel the same, but I do enjoy your presence immensely, and would leap at the chance to be romantically involved.” Logan folds his hands but he’s calmer now. Virgil huffs, blowing the air up at his bangs.</p>
<p>“You would leap huh?” He asks in more of a challenge than anything. Logan takes a moment to process but grimaces when he does. He clears his throat.</p>
<p>“Well perhaps not <em>leap</em> specifically. Maybe something a little less…” Logan makes a pose that resembles a certain royal but his face all screwed up makes Virgil hide his face again. In the sudden silence there is comfort. He bites his lip in thought, questions burning in his brain but none so prominent as the one he finds the courage to ask.</p>
<p>“How.. long? Have you felt like this..” The question weighs heavy in his mouth. It makes him keep his eyes to the ground and away from the one who will answer. He jerks at the sudden touch to his hand but Logan takes it gently in his to caress it softly.</p>
<p>“I myself have come to this conclusion just earlier today,” Logan tells him evenly. </p>
<p>“But according to Patton, months. Long enough for him to say I should do something about it.” He squeezes Virgil’s hand. Earlier today, meaning it’s why Virgil hadn’t been called for food when it’s normally ready, meaning Logan had been able to just follow through with a plan the moment he thought of it and not think of thirteen different terrible outcomes that could arise. Virgil swallows hard.</p>
<p>Logan waits patiently, so patiently like he always does, for him to answer. Virgil is the one to squeeze their hands now though he is not as soft as Logan. He squeezes tight as thoughts form and take shape. It’s not that he doesn’t like Logan, no he’s so nice to be around, a sense of comfort he doesn’t get with anyone else. He’s calming, and grounding, and so nice to be around.</p>
<p>“Maybe we could.. take it slow? Ish?” He says tentatively before he can think of all the terrible ways this can go wrong. The feel of the hand in his is pleasant, and if being romantically involved will get him more of that, more of the soft and nice smiles and <em>Logan, </em>he can’t think of a better alternative. Logan seems to beam at the idea. He nods along. Virgil takes a deep breath.</p>
<p>“Maybe we could.. start debating again?” He throws the suggestion out there, having missed the time together, the time not spent wondering if whatever he’s doing is wrong. Logan beams brighter at that suggestion.</p>
<p>“I would love to,” He smiles. The corner of Virgil’s mouth twitches up and he hides it in his hand. He’s got an idea for their topic of choice, then he can really grill Logan on how he expects this to work. Virgil is hoping for secure statements and plain reassurance that it will be okay. That it can last.</p>
<p>“Have you eaten?” Logan asks suddenly, a look of worry on his face. Virgil twists up his face, ready to brush past that statement when his stomach growls. He glares at a corner as Logan huffs.</p>
<p>“I knew it, you have been in bed all day. I am making food, please join me,” Logan stands and walks out, giving Virgil one more pointed stare before shutting his door. Virgil shakes his head, curling up in himself. Thoughts tell him whatever just happened isn’t real. The warmth of his hand where Logan touched tells him otherwise. Things seemed to go like that when the logical trait is involved. Logan has a way of making Virgil believe, and this would be something he really would want to believe.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>-dance-</p></blockquote></div></div>
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